Friday, December 2, 2011

For the Dog Who Has Everything

Christmas is coming, although your dog doesn't know it.

It seems that, growing up, my lovely bride’s family always opened one present on Christmas Eve, something that was strictly verboten in our house. However, Santa Claus always left us pajamas to wear on Christmas morning, even though the need for new pajamas would have made more sense to leave them for us the night before.

So, in a natural tradition-blending compromise, we now open a present from our pets every Christmas Eve - and it's always pajamas.

Every year, our loyal companions give us some nice flannel things, and we never give them anything commensurate in return. We’re not alone – dog owners everywhere give presents that are the canine equivalent of socks or underwear. How many fake, crusty bones or dog dishes do they really need?

So here’s a gift idea for the hard-to-buy-for mutt: the dashing moustache and/or Jaggeresque tongue balls.

That’s right. For only ten bucks, you can buy a safe, non-toxic rubber ball that looks like a moustache or a tongue, so that after you throw the thing and he goes to fetch it, he comes back in disguise! He now has a sweet ‘stache to impress the ladies or a big tongue to sass the hand that feeds him.

It’s the perfect gift for hairy or hairless dogs, which are the only two kinds of dogs yet invented.

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